Coulda, Woulda, Shoulda


This has been a difficult road.

 

Trust is a hard thing to come by.  A word, with so few letters.. and so much weight to it.  One thing I have learned the hard way recently, is who to trust with what, and how.

A heavy part of a support system relies on someone who can listen to you with out bias or judgements.  Someone who can bite their lip and hold their reservations- their opinions- their beliefs.

And just be there.  Just exist for a moment, for you.

I confided in a support person the other night about some heavy situations I was grappling with.  Fear for my safety was the only thing on my mind.  The other person proceeded to launch into a heavy speech about “I should have known” and at that point, I laid down the phone while they rattled on endlessly.

Five minutes later, I picked up the phone.

Still going.

ugghhhh…….

 

I never called the person back.  Not because I don’t care about them..

But because I care about myself.

 

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